Social Media and Its Addictiveness Among the Youth
Overview
This essay examines social media addiction among youth, tracing the development of social media platforms and exploring the mechanisms through which software algorithms contribute to addictive behavior. The paper presents arguments about the causes of addiction but lacks comprehensive analysis of the effects on young users and the author's clear position on the topic.
What this essay covers
- Introduction: Overview of social media development and its popularity among youth with thesis on addiction
- Body: Arguments on social media addiction causes and algorithmic design targeting user engagement
- Incomplete analysis: Missing substantive discussion of addiction effects and author's stance on the phenomenon
Preview
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Peer Review of Social media and its addictiveness among the youth.
I like the introduction to this piece. The development towards the problem is clear as the reader needs to know how social media began and the concern of social media's popularity on youths. However, the thesis statement does not give enough details about how to argue out the addiction topic. I also feel that the introduction should have included the statistics in the last sentence of the second paragraph. It is essential to give the country and global statistics about the use of social media. A citation should accompany the statistics to ensure the reader can confirm the legitimacy of the figures.
The draft presents valid arguments on social media addiction on youths and teenagers and the reasons for the addiction. It is also thoughtful to talk about how software engineers develop algorithms that target a person's social media use. The problem, however, is in the arrangement of individual paragraphs. A single paragraph should explain a single argument, a rule the draft does not adhere to. The paragraphs are short and carry mixed opinions. Some arguments are short enough to fit a single paragraph, but the essay splits it into two paragraphs.
Generally, the draft is good. I like the depth of information that explains the genesis of social media addiction. However, the draft does not present a bit of the effect of the addiction on the youths.